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Interviews

Body in the Paddock

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Body in the Paddock - jpeg (1)

Delightful author Karen Cullen recently released an equally delightful cozy mystery entitled Body in the Paddock, which features intrepid student journalist Fran Fitzpatrick. I sat down with Karen to chat with her about her new novel, as well as Breeding Trouble, her previous book.

Caroline: I absolutely loved Fran Fitzpatrick, the protagonist of Body in the Paddock. She’s determined, hilarious, sometimes socially awkward, and a bit klutzy too. And her heart is always in the right place. How did you come up with this character? Does she resemble anyone you know?

Karen: Fran’s relationship with Aunt Josephine and Uncle Johnny is loosely based on my relationship with the aunt and uncle I lived with during my first two years at UPEI, but that is where any resemblance to real people ends. While I tend to use humour in a stressful situation the way Fran does, Fran is completely fictional—she is not based on any particular person.

Caroline: Your novel is set largely on the University of PEI campus, where Fran attends classes—when she’s not too busy solving mysteries! Why did you choose to set the novel in PEI? Tell me more about your connection to the Island.

Karen: I choose the University of Prince Edward Island as the setting for Fran’s adventures because it is my alma mater. My intent when I first registered at UPEI in the mid 1980s was to study English literature with the goal of eventually becoming a journalist. When I was informed by a relative that a veterinary college was soon to open on the UPEI campus, I changed my major to my other interest—veterinary medicine. During one of my “pre-vet” years, I was the photographer and an occasional writer on our campus newspaper, The Netted Gem. I also had a show on the school’s radio station. I thought it would be fun to write a story loosely based on my time as a student at UPEI. I say loosely because, thankfully, there were no murders during my time there.

Caroline: In your non-writing life, you’re a veterinarian. How have you brought your science background and experiences as a veterinarian into writing fiction? I’m thinking especially of your first book, Breeding Trouble, but also of Body in the Paddock.

Karen: My first novel, Breeding Trouble, is centred on the heroine’s work life as a veterinarian. It felt natural to include a glimpse into the real world of veterinary medicine—cases, patients, clients, and clinic staff. While the individuals featured are completely fictional, some of the cases presented are based on real cases and patients I’ve seen over the years, as well as some of the client interactions. There is some scientific content in Body in the Paddock, but it is not veterinary focused. I don’t want to say much more for fear of giving away too much of the mystery.

Caroline: Body in the Paddock is the first of the Spud Isle Mysteries. Now that Fran has completed her first murder investigation, what do you think will be next for her? Have you started writing a sequel?

Karen: I have a few ideas for Fran’s next adventure. Currently, I’m working on the sequel to Breeding Trouble. Once that is complete, it will be Fran’s turn to get knee deep into another mystery . . . possibly literally.

Caroline: Have you always been a writer, or would you say that writing is more of a recent interest? When did you catch the writing bug?

Karen: I’ve been interested in writing since I was a preteen. Over the years I’ve tried my hand at writing plays, skits, nonfiction articles, and short stories. I started Breeding Trouble as a challenge to myself to write a full-length cozy mystery based on my profession. It was a huge learning curve, hence the seven-year timeline, but it was a lot of fun.

Caroline: What do you enjoy reading? Which fiction writers have influenced your own work?

Karen: I enjoy reading cozy mysteries, and not-so-cozy mysteries, as well as general fiction, science fiction, historical fiction, and biographies of both famous and ordinary people from the past. Some of my favourite authors are Carrie Stuart Parks, Mary Higgins Clark, Alexander McCall Smith, Christy Barritt, M.K. Dean, Jayne E. Self, and of course, Lucy Maud Montgomery.

Caroline: What advice do you have for other writers?

Karen: Write for the fun and experience, not fame and fortune. Your family and friends love you, so if you are looking for an honest critique of your manuscript seek out the opinions of strangers. I found it helpful to enter my manuscript into contests that provided constructive feedback. Learn from the critiques, but do not let them discourage you. Don’t get bogged down by all the “rules” on the internet—there are many styles of writing and many personalities of readers. Once your first draft is finished, hire an experienced editor to fine-tune your manuscript, and to give you an honest opinion. I have worked with two editors, and I have learned valuable lessons from both of them.

Caroline: Where can readers buy your books?

Karen: Both of my books are currently available on Amazon.

Louise Miller Mysteries: Breeding Trouble

Spud Isle Mysteries: Body in the Paddock

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Writing and Editing

Keeping Track of Time in Fiction

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Recently, I gave fellow members of the London Writers Society an editing exercise that began as follows: It was December 15, 2005, and I was eight months pregnant with the twins. It was nine in the morning, and I was eagerly awaiting my first client of the day. Two pages later, the exercise concluded with this: In April 2006 I gave birth to the twins and was grateful that Mr. Fletcher had spared my life that December night. 

What happened between the beginning and the end of the story was that Maisie, the narrator, was threatened by her client, Fletcher, that December morning. Most of the writers easily picked up on Maisie’s laughably long gestation period–if she was eight months pregnant in December, she should have given birth in January, not April. Fewer writers noticed that it wasn’t nighttime when Maisie’s life was spared, but morning.

While it’s not difficult to pick out timeline errors in short pieces like the one I gave the writers’ group, the task becomes much more challenging where novels are concerned.  Imagine that it’s Chapter 1 when Maisie mentions being eight months pregnant in December. Then, 300 pages later, she tells us it’s now April and she’s just given birth. Alert readers will remember the earlier reference to December and notice that the math is off.  But what if Maisie is a bit more subtle and says she gave birth as the daffodils were blooming, and we know that she lives in Southern Ontario? The glitch is less obvious because actual dates aren’t mentioned, but it’s still something that alert readers will notice. It will confuse them, jolting them right out of the fictional world you’re trying to create.

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These sorts of errors are common in the manuscripts I edit. It’s as though some writers aren’t fully conscious of the passage of time in their novels. Probably it’s because they’re too busy focusing on other aspects, such as plot or character development, which is understandable. But a writer can’t afford to let their timeline go awry. Your job is to write for the most alert reader–and that means keeping a strict eye on your timeline and ensuring that all of your time references make perfect sense.

How do you do this? Explicit labels can help. Some authors begin chapters or subsections with time references: Thursday, April 24th, for example. Some might add an exact time: 2:00 p.m. Being that specific is common in thrillers, where the characters might be racing against time. As an editor, I’m always pleased to see labelling of chapters or subsections with time data because it suggests that the writer has given serious thought to the time issues. But within those chapters and subsections, I still have to watch for problematic time references. Say it’s 2:00 p.m. when Fred is kidnapped and 6:00 p.m. when he’s found. But if the author says later that he was found five hours after being kidnapped, that’s a error, and it may cause a ripple effect of further errors if it’s overlooked. And if it takes Fred’s rescuers two hours to find him after they learn that without a doubt he’s being held in a tiny house only two blocks away, that’s a problem too–two hours is either inaccurate, or they’d better have a good excuse for being so slow to the rescue!

Making notes on your novel’s timeline is an excellent idea, and I would recommend doing this right from your first draft. I make such notes when I’m writing my own stories, and also on my authors’ timelines when I’m editing their work. Let’s say, for instance, that the action in a book I’m editing unfolds over several weeks. I jot down things like Chapter 1: Week One (first week of January), Monday morning, along with the main plot developments in Chapter 1, e.g., Laura bumps into old flame Ben (they broke up seven years ago), meets him that night for dinner. That way,  150 pages later, when it’s Week 8 and the events in Chapter 1 are referred to as occurring four months earlier, or in the summertime, I’ll know that this is wrong. You can easily write similar notes in a notebook, or type a few pages of notes. When you’re verifying timeline information as you self-edit, either of these is easier to flip through than a novel-length manuscript.  Or consider printing off blank calendar pages, which you can then fill in with dates, chapter numbers, and the main events of those chapters. This is also a handy reference that will keep you on track.

Be acutely conscious of the passage of time in your novel, and take the necessary measures to ensure accuracy every step of the way. That way, you won’t end up with silly gaffes like including a woman’s twelve-month pregnancy in your book!

 

 

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The Spirits of South Drive, Virginia's Ghost

New Book Release: The Spirits of South Drive

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TheSpiritsofSouthDrivefullsize_e-book cover

On May 20, 2023, I released my second novel, a cozy murder mystery called The Spirits of South Drive. It’s the sequel to Virginia’s Ghost in the Virginia Blythe Mysteries series.  Spirits could be described as a traditional whodunit in the vein of Agatha Christie; however, what sets it and the first book apart from such classic mysteries is the presence of ghosts. Spirits has four of them!

Like Virginia’s Ghost, the second novel is set in the antiques world.  In writing both books, I was inspired by my many years as the glass, ceramics, silver, and toys specialist for a Toronto auction house.  While working there, I devoured a lot of novels by Ruth Rendell, the queen of British mystery authors. Rendell’s novels are dark and always contain rich psychological portraits of the murderers–the books are more whydunits than whodunits. While her work prompted me to try to write a mystery of my own, I knew  I would take a different approach and create something that balanced the dark with some light and wasn’t as deeply focused on the character development and motivations of the criminal. In other words, something closer to cozy mystery. I knew I had my perfect setting; it always struck me that an auction house would be an ideal setting for a murder mystery, as the old warehouse building I worked in had a dark, creepy, shadowy basement in which we stored the antiques we were preparing to sell.  And it seemed natural that ghosts might haunt such a place, given all the old things we handled.  Maybe they were even attached to such things. As one of my characters says, “The ghosts probably ride right in on the sofas.” A few of our staff members wouldn’t have disagreed!

Instead of an auction house, much of The Spirits of South Drive takes place in a gloomy Victorian mansion, the contents of which the staff are appraising.  The novel features some of the same auction house characters the first book did–including protagonist Virginia Blythe, an antiques specialist who’s a somewhat reluctant sleuth but finds herself drawn into a murder investigation, and her boss and boyfriend George Schlegel, who’s eager to solve the crime.  And then there are the new characters–a homicide inspector, an intern, the suspects, and most importantly, the ghostly quartet of 1920s art students who provide readers with a portal to the past and have been haunting the mansion for nearly a century.  Why are they still there? And do they know anything about the grisly murder?  On both counts, it’s anyone’s guess . . .

The Spirits of South Drive is available on Amazon, Kobo, and Barnes & Noble.

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Writing and Editing

Why an Editor Is Not Going to Steal Your Work

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If you regularly hang out in online writers’ groups, you’ll notice a certain animosity toward editors from some of the participants. Although many writers in such groups see editors as valuable partners in elevating their manuscript to a publishable state, there’s a vocal minority, many of whom haven’t had their work edited before, who distrust editors. Their attitude stems partly from the discomfort of having their work scrutinized, which I fully understand. As an editor who’s also had my writing edited, I know it’s not easy being on the receiving end of criticism, however tactful and constructive it may be—and we editors go out of our way to be sensitive and helpful! But perceiving us as the enemy also stems from misconceptions about what we actually do. One of those misconceptions is that an editor is going to steal your work.

I’m surprised by how often I see people in writers’ groups saying this. I guess manuscript theft could happen, but only if you’re unfortunate enough to fall victim to a bad apple. Let me be clear—no reputable editor is going to steal their client’s work. If they did, word of this would get around and ruin the editor’s business in no time at all. Trust me, if an editor has spent years honing their skills and their reputation in the publishing industry, destroying their business is the last thing they want. They’re not looking to invite lawsuits from authors. And think about it: Would publishing someone else’s manuscript under their own name really be a good way for an editor to increase their income? If they wanted to self-publish your book, they’d have to put considerable time into editing it, designing it themselves (if they have the skills) or hiring a designer, and marketing it themselves. The reality is that very few books sell enough copies to make going to all that time and effort and expense worthwhile. And then there’s the fact that professional editors are an ethical bunch. Doing the best we can for our clients is part of our training, and most of us get upset with ourselves when we allow a mistake to slip into a client’s published book. We get into this business not only because we enjoy working with words and have a facility for it, but also because we like helping people make their dreams come true. It’s satisfying to see our authors succeed—a form of psychic pay. If we wanted to get rich quick, we would have chosen a different career path.

Behind “an editor is going to steal my work” lurks the big question: So how do I find a reputable editor? Start by consulting directories of professional editors, such as Editors Canada, Editorial Freelancers Association (EFA) in the US, and the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) in the UK. At such sites, you’ll find profiles of editors, and you can narrow the field to a few promising prospects who might suit your needs. Does the editor have experience in your genre? You wouldn’t want to work with someone who’s never edited chick lit if that’s what you’re writing, as they won’t be familiar with the conventions of the genre. What kind of qualifications do they have as an editor? Look at their educational achievements and length of time in the industry. And do they have a previous career that would make them a particularly good fit for you? Many editors had other careers well before they came to editing (for instance, I worked with antiques and was an appraiser at an auction house), and if their knowledge of a particular field matches your subject matter, they’d be an obvious choice.  All such details of an editor’s background should be apparent from the profile—and their website.

When you find someone promising, start an email conversation with them and you’ll gain a better understanding of whether or not the two of you are in sync. The editor should answer your emails within a reasonable period of time, seem interested in your project, and be pleasant to deal with. They should be able to explain the process if you were to work together and be able to define any publishing industry terms that might be unfamiliar to you (such as what the various types of editing entail). If communication is somehow difficult between you and the editor—you feel that you don’t see eye to eye, or that the editor isn’t adequately addressing your concerns—you probably won’t enjoy working together and should seek someone else.

When you ask, “What do you charge?” be aware that no professional editor is going to throw out a number before seeing a sample of your work (or in some cases, the entire manuscript) and knowing your manuscript’s word count. Writing quality varies significantly from one writer to the next, and editors can’t determine the depth of the editing or the types of editing you’ll need without seeing your writing. If an editor does give you a dollar figure without seeing a sample and knowing your word count, they’re not someone you should ever hire. And if they seem ridiculously cheap, that’s a red flag as well. And do ask for a sample edit; most editors will provide one of about a thousand words or so free of charge. It’s the best indicator of the editor’s skill level and whether or not their style of editing suits you. If you still need reassurance that you’re dealing with a professional, ask to see a copy of the editor’s standard contract. They should readily provide you with one, and the terms and conditions contained within are a good indicator of their level of professionalism.

 

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General Musing

Dusting Off My Blog

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With this tumultuous year at long last coming to an end, I’ve decided to make some changes. One of them is to dust off this blog and start writing here again, as much as I’m able to. A thick layer of dust has accumulated, as it’s been about three years since I last wrote a blog post. Excuse me while I pull out my feather duster, which is buried at the back of the closet, and get to work. It’ll only take a minute or two.

feather duster

Now that the dust is off, you may well ask why I’ve neglected to write for so long, and there have been plenty of reasons (or call them excuses if you will). The 2020s have been a trying decade so far for too many of us, thanks to the COVID-19 pandemic. Early in 2020, I started to write about my experiences of the pandemic here, but I only depressed myself by doing so and didn’t want to depress anyone else by publishing my musings online. The pandemic didn’t change my daily life much–I continued working from home, just as I’d done since 2007–but I did feel profoundly afraid, and not a little bit angry at those who weren’t doing the right things to protect themselves and others from disease. In time my negative emotions began to dissipate, but the pandemic continued taking up too much space in my brain. And even though I’m pretty introverted, it made me feel very isolated. However, I count myself among the fortunate: I haven’t had the virus myself or lost anyone close to me because of it.

Then, in late 2020, we moved from Toronto to London–not the big London in England, but the little London in Ontario. It’s a city of approximately 400,000 people, and it’s not much like the megalopolis that is Toronto, the city where I’d lived my entire life until then. It’s smaller, quieter, and older, and it’s a bit like a village in some parts. Moving made me feel as if I’d been dropped on another planet and, two years later, I’m still adjusting–though the more places I visit here, the more at home I feel. Because the pandemic continues to be with us, I still mask in public places, and I’ve felt that this is one thing that’s inhibited me from making new friends–that and not feeling quite ready to join the sorts of groups where I might meet those who share my interests.

What else have I been doing? Editing–a lot. I was fortunate in that my work didn’t dry up during the worst of the pandemic. On the contrary, it seemed as if clients had more time on their hands to crank out their novels or memoirs, which they then passed on to me. One enormous project, which I edited over nine months, consisted of four autobiographical novels totalling 560,000 words! I’ve been writing my second novel too, The Spirits of South Drive, a cozy mystery. It’s the sequel to Virginia’s Ghost and is nearly ready for publication. But I only got as far as completing the book cover because so much has  happened during 2022. This year has taken away far more than it’s given, with two major losses–our dog in March, and my sister in October–and numerous other stressors and aggravations I won’t go into. Suffice it to say that 2022 has been–without any shred of a doubt–the most difficult year I can remember. It’s taken a toll, but I’m ready to move on from it now and am doing my best to generate some optimism about the future.

Happy new year, everyone.  May 2023 be everything you’re hoping for.

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Interviews

Princeton: A Love Story

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Princeton, a border collie and black Lab cross, was no ordinary dog. And Terry Fong, the author of Princeton: A Love Story and an Alberta poultry farmer, was no ordinary dog owner. Princeton and Terry were the very best of friends, and they shared the deepest possible bond and an unwavering commitment to one another. At the age of twelve, Princeton was diagnosed with canine osteosarcoma and given a year to live, but thanks to the efforts of dedicated veterinarians and Terry’s unflagging support, the dog defied the odds and lived for several more years. Terry wanted to ensure that Princeton’s remaining years were as rich and as joyful as possible, so the two embarked on amazing journeys through Western and Northern Canada, and they touched the hearts of everyone they met. I spoke with Terry about Princeton: A Love Story.

 

Photograph by Cam Shaw
Photograph by Cam Shaw

 

Caroline: I’m not going to lie—of all the books I’ve edited in my twelve years of freelance editing, your book made me cry the most. But often it made me laugh out loud too, as Princeton could be such a clown. I fell hopelessly in love with him, and it seems that everyone he met did too. What was it about Princeton that endeared him so to people? What qualities did he possess that made him so special to you?

Terry: I think what endeared Princeton to me and others was his resilience and happy-go-lucky demeanour. During the seventeen years Princeton and I lived together, I never saw him once feel sorry for himself. He was the type of dog who relished every waking moment and refused to let any hardship deter him from his love of life. He especially loved being a farm dog, as it gave him a purpose to accompany his can-do attitude. During his battle with cancer, I think this attitude served him well. People were always impressed when they saw the old three-legged dog hop around as if there was nothing bothering him.

Another quality that made him so special to me was his loyalty. Often our days around the farm would be twelve to sixteen hours long. Princeton would rarely leave my side, regardless of the weather or regardless of any personal hardship he may have been suffering. I will always think of him as the most devoted friend I will ever have. I also know I will have no greater friend for the rest of my life.

 

Photograph by Cam Shaw
Photograph by Cam Shaw

 

Caroline: Your book is searingly honest. We watch as Princeton undergoes a series of complex medical procedures, and we see how this affects him and you. But in between these episodes, the book often brims with humour. For readers, it’s a roller-coaster ride of emotions. If I’d gone through the emotional pain you obviously went through during Princeton’s decline, I’m not sure I could have found it within myself to write about such experiences. What was it like for you to revisit that time by writing about it? And what were you hoping to accomplish by writing about Princeton’s life?

Terry: There were many difficult times while writing Princeton’s memoir. I started writing a few weeks after his death, only finding the time to do so between 2:00-3:00 a.m. every day. This went on for two years. There were times I would find myself crying, thinking of everything we went through together. But as you said, the book also has many humorous moments throughout. While writing the initial manuscript, I didn’t intend it to be humorous, much the same way I never intended it to be sad or difficult. The words I wrote were simply a reflection of the life Princeton and I shared together. Our relationship was very special, and I know we both looked at things the same way. I suppose that as difficult it was at times to revisit the points of our life together, it was also an honour to think of them again.

As I’m sure you recall from when we first spoke, I still wasn’t convinced I was ever going to let anyone read about the life Princeton and I shared. Maybe this is why I managed to get through it. I was writing the manuscript for me and Princeton only, and however painful the memories were at times, they were still the memories of us together and they needed to be written. And If things were especially difficult, I would remind myself of a promise made to Princeton before he died: that I would write of our life together.

Caroline: Princeton: A Love Story stayed with me for a long time after I’d finished working on it—it made a deep impression on me and made me very conscious of how precious the time I spend with my own dog, now quite senior, is to me. What sort of things do you hope people will take away from your book? And how have readers reacted to it so far?

Terry: I suppose I’m being selfish, but what appeals to me most about people reading Princeton’s memoir is knowing that he continues to live on. Not just in my memories but in the thoughts of others as well. Besides that, it makes me so happy knowing that some people who read the book will honour their own relationships with their pets maybe just a little more. Not to say they don’t in the first place, but perhaps they’ll realize there is no shame in the way they love their pets. One veterinarian who read the book commented on this, saying that reading about the relationship Princeton and I shared will make others aware that the bond between human and animal can be one of the most rewarding we as people can ever have.

I recall on one occasion a veterinarian and educator went to an Chapters Indigo store shortly after the book’s release and purchased ten copies to share with his family and others in his profession. Not only was I proud of this, but I know Princeton was as well.

Another thing I hope others take away from the book is that a prognosis, however grave, doesn’t always mean imminent death or even hardship. Veterinary medicine, like all types of medicine, isn’t always a hard science. There are always exceptions, and often these exceptions arise from giving an animal a chance and supplying hope. Sometimes it’s hope that’s needed most.

Interestingly, I’ve heard other readers comment that the book reminds them of relationships they have had with their human counterparts. People they’ve lost to cancer throughout the years. Others have commented that what has been most memorable for them after reading the book is all the great places Princeton and I visited. I guess the books leaves different impressions on different readers, and I think that’s most important when telling a story.

 

Photograph by Cam Shaw
Photograph by Cam Shaw

 

Caroline: You and Princeton travelled extensively despite the state of his health; you went to extraordinary lengths to make his last few years as happy as you possibly could. Is there a particular trip that stands out for you, and if so, what made it so significant? What do you think was Princeton’s favourite place, and why?

Terry: I think the most memorable trip we took was our adventure up north in the Yukon. Not because it was necessarily better than any of the other trips we took, but because it was somewhere Princeton and I had never visited before. From the never-ending daylight hours to the grumpy insects, it’s something I will never forget. And the solitude was special as well. Never-ending twisting highways without seeing anyone for miles. We loved that.

Our favourite place was Tofino. Without a doubt. Princeton and I loved the beaches and the ocean. It was a tranquil place for us both. We belonged there. In time he and I will return there together, as I would like his and my ashes scattered in the water. When we weren’t on the beaches, we were having dinner or hanging out with friends we made when we first arrived there. We visited Tofino over two summers, and it felt like our second home.

Caroline: Do you have a new writing project in the works? If so, what can you share about it?

Terry: When I was in grade school and university, I was told writing should be my profession. I’m still not sure if I agree with this. I still think Princeton’s memoir is a wonderful story told by a mediocre writer. Nonetheless, I have started another project. And like the one before, I’m not sure if it will be shared. If I do decide to have others read what I’ve written, however, I don’t think it could ever compare to what I wrote about Princeton.

Caroline: Where is your book available?

Terry: The book is moving in a direction of its own. Most Chapters Indigo and Coles stores in the Edmonton area now stock the book. More have made verbal commitments to do the same, including those in other provinces. By the end of the year, I hope it’s available in stores throughout Canada. Not only have they been very supportive, but so has Audreys Books in downtown Edmonton. Blackberry Cove Marketplace in Ucluelet, Vancouver Island, now stocks the book as well. The book can also be purchased online from Amazon.ca and Amazon.com. Ebook to follow very shortly.

For further information or to contact Terry Fong, please visit Corner Tree Press.

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Writing and Editing

Beyond Typos: Why Get Your Work Professionally Edited?

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This blog post originally appeared as an article on this site. Although most self-publishing authors now understand the value of having their manuscript edited, this wasn’t the case a few years ago. If you’re a writer who’s wondering how necessary professional editing is, please read on.

It’s a fact: writers need to have their work professionally edited. If you’ve spent countless hours writing and rewriting your novel, you’re much too close to your work and have probably read it so many times that you’ll overlook even the most basic typos. You’ve gone word blind.

But real editing goes well beyond simply knowing how to use spell-check to catch typos, and unless you’re an editor, you won’t be aware of all the types of errors you should be looking for. Although you may be tempted to get your cousin who majored in English Lit fifteen years ago to edit your work, you should instead hire a trained professional who can shape and polish your work to publishable standards. Your work deserves nothing less.

Here are some important reasons to get your work professionally edited: consistency, conciseness, and clarity.

Consistency

You’re probably unaware of the myriad ways in which an editor maintains consistency across the board. Without consistency, discerning readers will be distracted from your content by bothersome little errors. Worse, inconsistencies often cause readers to scratch their heads in confusion. So much for clarity! This example illustrates just a few of the types of inconsistencies that editors look for.

Marion selected her favorite dress, which was a beautiful colour—blue, to match her eyes. To go with it, she picked out black sandals, a crimson cashmere scarf, and a nutmeg-brown hand-bag. The handbag was a present she’d received from her erstwhile fiancé, Edmond J. Babcock. Edmond was a mover and shaker in the fashion business, and he’d given her a number of designer hand bags over the years. She enumerated them: 1 red, three brown, and 5 blue. Then there was that huge moss-green bag that he had matched precisely to the color of Marianne’s eyes.

Did you catch the inconsistencies?

  • The sample contains both American and Canadian spelling—favorite and colour. And to make matters worse, colour is spelled a second time in the American way (color). Keeping in mind the market for their book, the author needs to decide whether to use Canadian or American spelling.
  • The word handbag is treated three ways: as one word, as a hyphenated word, and as two words.
  • Numbers are sometimes spelled out (three) and sometimes written as numerals (1).
  • Most troubling of all is the Marion and Marianne problem.  Given the author’s general sloppiness, we might assume the two are one and the same person. Then again, there could be two characters here, as one has blue eyes and the other has green. Or has the author simply been careless enough to allow Marion’s blue eyes to morph to green?  (You’d be surprised by how often this occurs.) Would Edmond really be dumb enough to give Marion a handbag the colour of Marianne’seyes? (If so, this could explain why he’s an erstwhile fiancé.) You can see the confusion that a few small inconsistencies cause. All this can be sorted out only by querying the author about their intentions, which is what a professional editor will do.

Conciseness

It’s all too easy to fall in love with words, and some writers think that the bigger the words, the better. If you pepper your prose with lots of fancy adjectives and adverbs and throw in wordy phrases, won’t that will make your writing more sophisticated? Usually not. More often than not, readers will feel lost in the Land of Verbosity and may need a machete to hack their way through to any clear understanding of what you have to say. At best, wordiness slows readers down. At worst, it makes them grow exasperated and impatient as they wrack their brains to decipher the intended meaning. They may ultimately lose the battle and toss the book aside. Never sacrifice clarity for the chance to throw around pretentious words and impressive-sounding phrases. Nothing is more important than clear communication, and it is the editor’s job to unearth the meaning hidden in wordy manuscripts by removing all that clutter.

Here’s an example of wordiness extraordinaire:

Alfred, who was a distinguished professor of note who prided himself, for the most part (although he had lapses) on his perfectionistic, meticulous, careful, persnickety, detail-oriented attention to the finer points of domestic science, in modern times known as housekeeping or even housework, had, as a matter of fact, just this morning detected, much to his horror, the presence of the a beetle, which appeared to be of the ladybug type, crawling in his breakfast cereal, which this morning was granola.

Here’s my version, which I’ve edited for wordiness:

This morning, Alfred, a distinguished professor and mostly meticulous housekeeper, was horrified to find a ladybug in his granola.

That was pretty easy to understand, wasn’t it? No meaning has been sacrificed.

Clarity

You’ve already seen examples of how clarity has been lost when the author hasn’t been consistent or concise. There are endless ways in which authors can create great clouds of confusion in readers’ heads. Here are just a couple of examples:

Hiking staff in hand, Fred’s head was set firmly on the road ahead.

Oh dear. You can be forgiven for thinking that Fred’s head has somehow sprouted a hand that is carrying a hiking staff, for this is what the writer seems to be telling us. In fact, Fred himself is carrying the staff. This is a classic example of a dangling modifier, in which the initial phrase attaches incorrectly to what follows it. Fiction manuscripts are often littered with dangling modifiers; the result is often bizarre imagery and unintentional humour. We have an added problem here as well, for apparently Fred’s head is also on the road while he carries his walking stick, which is highly unlikely. The writer surely means that Fred’s gaze is focused on the road. This example could be corrected as follows:

Hiking staff in hand, Fred stared at the road ahead.

Another surefire way to confuse your readers is to fail to identify clearly what you mean by words like it and this. Editors identify this as an unclear pronoun antecedent error. Here’s an example:

Tony poured the Cabernet Sauvignon in happy anticipation of Cynthia’s arrival. She burst through the door, her purse stuffed with a yappy, writhing chihuahua. Later he would reflect with considerable disappointment that it hadn’t tasted at all like he’d expected it to.

Has Cynthia’s dog been the unfortunate victim of Tony’s carnivorous urges? Or is Tony merely disappointed in the wine? The odds are good that the writer is talking about the wine in that last sentence, but if he’s given to black humour, the “it” could refer to the dog. We really can’t know for sure without querying the author.

The three Cs—consistency, conciseness, and clarity—are just some of the essentials that an editor addresses. Unless these issues are taken care of, a manuscript can suffer from mind-boggling verbosity and confusing constructions that cause readers to give up in frustration. A professional edit will ensure that the message is clear and comprehensible, thereby allowing the writer to reach the intended audience.

 

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Writing and Editing

The Virtues of Sample Edits

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Like most editors, I’m willing to do free sample edits for prospective clients who request them. Typically, I’ll edit a thousand words or so–that’s four double-spaced pages. Of course, not all authors request a sample edit before hiring me; they determine from our email exchanges and the content of my website that somehow I’m the editor for them, so the sample edit gets skipped. But is it wise to skip it?  I’ll consider this question from the perspective of both the author and the editor.

Many authors who come to me have never been edited before and so are anxious. Being edited is a new and scary adventure to them, and many questions will course through their minds. Will I still recognize my writing after you’re done with it?  Will you stomp all over my style, my author’s voice? Are you skilled enough and sufficiently careful to catch even the most minuscule of errors?  (Can you even spell “minuscule”?) Will your comments be helpful and insightful, your criticisms gentle and respectful?  Ideally, the sample edit will answer all these questions and will reassure the author that the editor is suitable for the project. However, sometimes the author may decide that the editor is doing too much or not enough or is in some other way not right for them and will seek someone who’s a better fit. So the sample edit is often the deciding factor when it comes to which editor to hire.

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I’ve realized more and more over my nearly twelve years of freelance editing that the sample edit is every bit as valuable to me as it is to the author. First, it allows me to gauge how many pages per hour of the client’s work I can edit, thus making my cost estimates more accurate. Second, it allows me to ensure that the author is a good fit for me. (Yes, authors audition editors via the sample edit, but we audition authors too.) Point number two hit me like a ton of bricks recently, when I was approached by a woman I’ll call Vivian.

Vivian was a wonderful writer, though her writing still could have used an editor’s touch. After the initial friendly email chit-chat, things went south. Vivian kept saying she hadn’t received my estimate (I sent it four times). When she did get it, she wasn’t happy with my numbers and I had to justify them. She then requested a sample edit, and I sensed I should tread lightly. The bulk of my corrections were grammatical fixes, with some stylistic editing to fine-tune the odd cumbersome sentence. In marginal comments, I explained my reasons for the types of changes suggested. I also strongly advised Vivian not to use lyrics from songs that couldn’t possibly be in the public domain, explaining why this was a bad idea.

Sadly, Vivian responded with irritation. She thought I’d disrespected her writing voice–never my intention–and explained why my grammatical fixes and stylistic tweaks were unacceptable to her. Clearly, she had devised a lot of her own “rules”–more like personal idiosyncrasies, since from what I could see they were unrelated to known editorial style guidelines. We were speaking a different language. Vivian still wanted to work together, but I explained that if she was that upset upon seeing a short sample, she wouldn’t like the rest of the edited manuscript either, and I couldn’t risk having an unhappy client. I also couldn’t play by her rules when I had no way of anticipating what they would be; I’d be unknowingly violating them at every turn. I didn’t see how I could improve upon the edit I’d submitted to her and said I hoped she’d find a more suitable editor.

Vivian asked me to reconsider and returned the sample with her changes to my edits. She’d accepted very few of my suggestions, even the advice about lyrics. That sealed it for me: I knew I couldn’t work with her. I’m a reasonable person who never expects authors to accept all my suggestions, but if they accept next to nothing, then we’re obviously an editorial mismatch. Fortunately, in my experience such an extreme mismatch is rare. But if I hadn’t done the sample edit, I never would have known how incompatible we were until it was too late.

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Writing and Editing

The Perfect Edit: Is It Possible?

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Earlier this year, one of my young clients asked, “If my manuscript isn’t perfect, do I get a rebate?” I’ve been editing for twelve years, and this was a first. He’d found what he thought were two errors in a short story I’d edited, but only one of them qualified as a legitimate error.  What he didn’t seem to appreciate all that much was the fact that I’d caught hundreds of errors. And like any good editor should, I’d also tightened up, smoothed out, and clarified his writing. He had a limited budget, so I’d done exactly one pass (or round) of editing–a pass for me being an intensive edit, followed by another read-through in which I do more editing. I explained to him that one pass doesn’t guarantee perfection.  Most traditionally published books, I said, go through multiple editing passes and proofreading, and even then, an error or two might still slip through. So no rebate was going to happen.

This theme of perfection cropped up again in November,  when I gave a workshop to a group of writers at the Toronto Reference Library. I covered the process of hiring and working with a freelance editor. One thing I mentioned was not expecting editing perfection, especially after only one pass, which is often all my self-publishing clients can afford. My workshop included a handout, and later I received an email from a participant saying that he’d found a mistake in it, and that because of this one tiny error, he’d be very hesitant to hire me and would wonder what else I didn’t know. In my reply, I acknowledged that I had indeed made a mistake and added that I’d never made any claims to be perfect, and he won’t find an editor who is. I’d also been wearing my writer’s hat when I put together the handout and, as every editor knows, even editors need to be edited.

As editors, all we can do is our very best. And we do try very hard. We tend to be perfectionists, which is why we are doing the sort of work we do in the first place, and we truly feel bad, often embarrassed, when someone points out something we’ve missed. Clients have very high expectations of us, as they ought to, but some degree of error is inevitable simply because we’re human beings and not robots. We have off days, or we get tired, stressed, or ill.  An error rate of 5 percent in an editing pass is not unreasonable, which is why, if the client can afford it, the manuscript should go through more than one editing pass and ideally be proofread by a second editor. It’s all too easy for anyone, including editors, to go word blind after having read a manuscript several times, which is why a second pair of editorial eyes for the proofreading phase is recommended.

Unfortunately, some people delight in catching others out, clearly enjoying the “Gotcha!” moment. But the editing process should never degenerate into a smug dance of one-upmanship. When the writer respects the expertise the editor brings to the table and the editor respects the story the writer is trying to tell, then this sort of game doesn’t happen. Instead, editing becomes a wonderfully collaborative process, with both parties feeding off each other’s suggestions as they work toward their mutual goal: improving the quality of the manuscript. Tact needs to be employed along the way so that no one ever winds up feeling stupid or careless. And appreciation of each other’s contributions to the process is critical to making the experience a positive one for both the writer and editor. Yes, the odd error can creep in or stubbornly stick despite everything editors do to prevent such mishaps, but ultimately mistakes are best prevented by doing more rounds of editing.

 

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Book Reviews, Writing and Editing

Book Review: American Slang

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You’re reading a novel set during the Middle Ages, and a conflict breaks out between defenders of a castle and enemy forces. One of the characters describes those who are energetically engaging in battle as “going at it hammer and tongs.” And when a defender forcefully ejects an enemy soldier from inside the castle, he’s jubilant about giving the attacker “the bum’s rush,” adding that he’s “happy as a pig in slop.” Are you cringing yet? The problem here is that the slang is all wrong for the period: “going at it hammer and tongs” originated in 1833, “the bum’s rush” dates from the 1920s, and “happy as a pig in slop” is from the 1970s. Oops. Clearly, neither the author of the book nor its editor had a copy of  American Slang, (fourth edition, 2008) on hand to prevent them from making such embarrassing bloopers.

American Slang, edited by Barbara Ann Kipfer and Robert L. Chapman, is an indispensable reference book for anyone who writes or edits historical fiction. In addition to defining slang terms, the entries indicate how such terms are used in sentences, note examples of synonymous slang, and provide notes on etymology if this is known. But the book contains other features that make it more useful than other slang dictionaries. The addition of dating labels really sets this dictionary apart from many I looked at; when known, the era or sometimes even the exact year when a slang term originated is noted, and I found that very few entries had no indication of date.  As well, the social group or milieu from which the term came is often identified–“Underworld,” “Jazz musicians,” “Teenagers,” to name a few–giving writers and editors additional clues about the appropriate context for using the slang. The dictionary also contains “impact symbols” that designate slang that is considered either completely taboo or vulgar, so you’ll know to avoid using these in most situations.

Apart from being an essential reference, American Slang is a treat for anyone who loves words.  I find myself dipping into it periodically, simply because it’s hard to resist the chance to learn about some of the most vigorous and colourful words and phrases in the English language.  As the blurb on the back says, American Slang is “the most buzzworthy, banging collection of colloquial American English”–and if you’re not quite sure what that means, you definitely need this book!

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